Tina Benias-The Chronicles: Day 1

A Writer’s Reckless Commitment to the Written Word

Day One: I am a writer.

What have I just done?

Honestly.

Is it necessary to make this kind of commitment? I mean, who is this commitment for? My readers? I don’t have any. Myself? As a method of torture perhaps. Committing to an authentic, well written, personal post every day seems part – narcissistic, part – pointless, but here I am writing my first entry and I am forcing my apprehensive fingers across this keyboard as though they were meeting with hot coals. Oooo, burnnnn.

It’s been a long while since I’ve soul-written, that is to write from a place that requires translation to be understood. For me, soul writing is therapy.  I’ve been parading around as a ‘writer’ for a while now, in fact, I am now officially a Paid Writer,  however, soul writing and every other kind of writing are completely different and I see them as different vocations entirely.

Soul writing is at times, one of the hardest and painful tasks to do, but for people like me, with little to no other talents for creative expression, it has to be done. Imagine digging a deep splinter from your finger. It hurts but you know that in order to be better you have to rip that fucker out. That is the type of catharsis I face at times.

I can count on one hand, the number of times I have had true catharsis from writing. It is a powerful and explosive feeling- as though my fingers move on their own as the thick sludge of my soul pours out. Problem is, once it’s out, it’s out. Really out. You see, catharsis for me is not just the writing part, it’s the sharing part and that is where I often get stuck. I am, more often than not, overcome with fear and therefore never release my writing.

So this is it, post one. The post where I pledge, as of today, to write something of value each day in an attempt to clear a road out of my writer’s block and work on becoming a better writer. Perhaps I may also become a better human in the process too.

Signed,

Tina Benias
Wannabe writer
Discontented corporate slug
Confused Gen Y dreamer
Potty mouth

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